Trendy Hitched

Work life balance. We’ve all seen it. In office emails, motivational posters at the hallways, even in some company’s mission-vision, people use this buzzword left and right.

Has anyone honestly achieved it? I bet not (except perhaps those in monotonous dead-end jobs, if those even exist). In this time of age, something has always got to give. Sad fact but true. I’m not complaining though. I am done having whining as my sport and I have long agreed to give “balance” a rest. I’m on to the more realistic “work life integration” paradigm. Here’s how I do it.

• Delegate. No one should underestimate the power of delegation, especially when you work with a team. Whether it’s the peer at work or the house nanny, one should learn to delegate tasks. Delegation helps me work smarter, not harder.

• Stop being a perfectionist. I am definitely guilty on this department and I blame it on the Middle Child Syndrome, hahaha. Being a perfectionist makes one feel more tired and anxious on almost anything one does. Now, I let go of some of the small details, I no longer sweat the small stuff. Setting realistic expectations for yourself and your family/colleagues also helps.

• Learn to say no. This perhaps is one of the most important tool to achieve a good life. It is such a strong word that one must say if one will end up getting so worked up that there’s no time and energy left to fulfill other obligations.

• Practice “technology sunset”. This is one term I’ve seen in a blog before (sorry but I could no longer locate and remember the blog). Basically it tells us that one should set a time where we turn off all our devices and just enjoy the rest of the night, just like how the sun does it everyday for us. You may be home early from work but too busy working on your Blackberries or Androids, instead of having  meaningful conversations with your loved ones. One practice I try to religiously do is putting my Blackberry on sleep mode once I get to our bed. This lessens the distractions at night.

• Have a flexible work schedule. I’m lucky to have a work that allows me to leave at three in the afternoon and just continue  work in the evening so I can make it to my doctor’s appointment, without having to file a day off from work. I also get to work from home when I’m having some renovations at home. Go find a work schedule that fits your needs.

• Have a good laugh. A good sense of humor never fails to keep me sane in the everyday chaos we experience. Make sure you find time to chat with a friend, your sister or your mom every now and then. A good laugh can make all the difference.

Photo credit: http://www.the-means-of-life.blogspot.com

Today, I decided to make a list of what I consider valuable learnings I have acquired for the past ten years or so of my adult life. My life’s been on a roller coaster since I lost the tween status and I consider myself blessed to have experienced it. For without those challenges, my life would’ve been ridiculously boring, so here goes.

• Always read the user’s manual. No matter how tedious or boring (to some) it seems to be, it saves one from the great anxiety of not being able to make something work or function as it supposed to be.

• Complaining does not and will not get you anywhere near where you want to be. It does however lessen your agitation every time you whine about it , which in turn reduces your heart palpitations. Yes, whining sometimes helps us get by in our daily lives and can be considered healthy if done in moderation.

• Just because you don’t like something does not mean it is universally bad. Each of us is born unique and each of us has different set of tastes and preferences. Some may be similar but still varying to some extent. What one considers classy may come across as tacky to someone else. What one believes as a norm may actually be an exception to another. Get the point?

• It is important to know when to open one’s mouth. One does not have to say what’s on one’s mind all the time. Yes people, some thoughts are best kept in the corners of our minds. As H. Jackson Brown, Jr put it, good manners sometimes mean simply putting up with other people’s bad manners. Unfortunately, that requires a lot of effort for some people, which  leads me to my next point..

• We should not expect people around us to be nice and proper all the time, especially during trying times. We will always get offended by others and we gotta accept that fact of life. Ricky Gervais once wrote, no one has the right to never be offended. He nailed it! At some point in your life, truth will hit you hard and knock you down. It’s up to you how fast you will get up to your feet and be back in the game of life.

• Money might seem to be everything you need in your life right now, but IT IS NOT. Money spent can always be earned back but relationships, once broken, are hard to revive.

• You don’t get to choose the problems life will throw you, just as you don’t get to choose your family. The only choice you have really is how you react to these kinds of situations. Actually, you got two choices here – one is you try to become an adult and deal with it with as much compassion, patience, and diplomacy one can get out of life. Or, you become neurotic and let all hell break loose. Based on experience, it is always good to have the former as the first course of action.

• Lastly, do not be too hard on yourself. It only makes you bitter, frustrated and ugly. Life’s too short to be wasted perfecting it and nobody gets out alive of it anyway.

In this time of age, people have become more open in sharing their thoughts through various social media. May it be on Facebook, Twitter or the newly launched Google+, people use these tools to express their emotions on almost anything. And when I say anything, it could mean a celebratory dinner that they enjoyed, a pleasant surprise from a loved one, a poor service from a company, an annoying behavior that they cannot tolerate, or worst, a private and personal experience that nobody needs to be aware of. The last one obviously makes me cringe the most!

I must admit, I have bad days. I do post rants once in a while (mostly about work). And I had probably posted one or two too much information type of thing in the past. But even then, I filter what I put out in the digital world. As much as I can, I try not to expose myself out there. It’s just not my thing. That’s why I do not understand why some people would share something so personal or private in the cyber world. Nobody needs to know about your horrid love life issues. Except for your therapists perhaps.

So the next time you feel like verbalizing your bad day or saying something lewd or rude, always remember this – Whatever you post out there will be available for the next decades and who knows what your children can find about what their parents said or did online. If that still doesn’t work, go get yourself some duct tape and save your rants for your therapy day.

SILENCE IS GOLDEN DUCT TAPE IS SILVER FUNNY T-SHIRT (2) (clipped to polyvore.com)